6/23/07 through 6/29/07

6/23/07 and 6/24/07


I am still in good humor, but I feel very much as though I am coming down with a cold. I have had a really stuffy nose all day, so that is no fun and I am kind afraid that I won't sleep well tonight even though I really need to sleep, but we will see.


So, starting yesterday, it was an ok day, mostly a good day because I was able to send emails and receive emails and that makes my day good. Unfortunately it is extremely frustrating to do internet here (I was online for 2 hours and just read three emails - two from Jorge and one from my mom and I sent three - two to Jorge and one to my mom and dad) and I had already written those emails! So I spent 800 cFA on internet and then another 450 to print three pages of Jorge's emails (a luxury that I permitted myself so as to be better able to respond and internalize his emails). Unfortunately, I can't use my memory stick for fear of viruses and I can't really afford to lose my computer to a virus, so . . . from now on I will use a new cd each time I go to the internet to send mail. Wasteful, I know, but I don't have any other ideas right now.



Anyway, so class yesterday morning was just ok. Like I said last Saturday, for some reason I feel very unmotivated class-wise on Saturdays. Right after class we went to Kpalime. We did internet first and then had some fan milk (I had a chocolate one this time - it was good, kind of tastes like the chocolate soft serve ice cream at Middlebury - nothing super special, but a good cold snack). Then we walked around the market a bit - there were five of us girls all walking around together. I bought another piece of cloth to have made into a skirt.



To get back to Nyogbo from Kpalime we took our first bush taxi. I should have realized that it would be the same as at a taxi stand in Uruguay where there is a line and you are supposed to get in the first taxi in line. We just picked a taxi and got in and practically caused a huge riot in front of the cars. Unfortunately, the taxi drives just kept telling us to get out of the car and not telling us WHY so of course we weren't too inclined to get out especially since the driver of the specific taxi we were sitting in was sort of like "they picked me, just deal with it." Eventually we understood and got out and into the taxi that had been first in the line-up and we were on our way. The taxi ride wasn't really scary at all - the driver was being really careful I think.



We got back to Nyogbo around 5 and the plan was to go to our houses, pick up our overnight bags and bike to Koumaou, the other training village, but as soon and we got to our tech center it started to pour buckets. We waited a bit and then left. It was fun - our first bike ride in which we actually had a destination. It was amusing - all these white girls in a line on their identical bicycles. Kids all along the way screamed "yovo" at us. It is funny the yovo thing. The kids get such a kick out of it that it makes me laugh. I don't know how it could really make someone angry when it is coming from little tiny children. The song goes "yovo, yovo, bon soir, ça va? merci!" and it just means, "white person, white person, good evening, how are you? thank you!" See, not harmful at all. (oh, but speaking of harmful, one girl said she saw a huge scorpion on the ride over . . . I missed it).



The bike ride wasn't too difficult although there were some small hills. Just as we got there it started to pour again. We had been told that there was a restaurant that made good pizza and so we went out in the dark and rain to look for it. It wasn't exactly what I would call a restaurant, but more of like a food shack, you know, street hamburger style except that this food wasn't fast at all. We sat under a tin metal roof in back on some benches and waited around two hours for little tiny pizzas that didn't even have any cheese and that cost four U.S. dollars. I was so glad I didn't order one when I saw them because I know I would have felt awful spending so much money for that. I didn't spend any money - just ate two oranges and I had eaten some bread with a cream cheese like cheese before that. While at the restaurant waiting they played this game called "never have I ever" and you have to say something that you have never done, but that you think other people in the group have. Everytime someone says something that you HAVE done, you lose a point until people start falling out of the game because they get down to zero.



After those who ordered pizza ate, we left and walked back to the tech house. Most of the trainees were there and we were planning on having a game night, but it wasn't all that much fun. First I just watched a group play a card game that I don't know how to play. Then we played UNO for a while and then we watched a movie - a stupid movie. I slept through the middle of it. Then we went to sleep all scattered around on carpets and the floor. I slept on my sleeping bag on the floor and obviously didn't sleep super well besides the fact that I was already starting to feel sick and I went to bed around three hours past my normal bedtime of 9:30 or 10:00.



I woke up around the usual time of 5:30/6:00. We left the tech house early (around 7:00) and biked back to our village. The bike ride probably took us around half an hour. It isn't too far, but the ride back was harder than the ride there because it was more uphill. I still really like my bicycle seat, though, and the bikes are fun to ride.



When I got home I washed my clothes - lots of clothes this time. Several people came into our compound and had great fun watching the yovo try to wash her own clothes (there is a child screaming bloody murder right outside my window and he/she has been screaming for the last 15 minutes, or at least it feels like it has been that long. I wonder what they are doing to him/her. . . ?). My Ewe teacher )The fifteen year old girl) was one of those people who came over to laugh at me. She said that it was a good thing that my clothes weren't all that dirty, otherwise I wouldn't be doing a very good job of getting them clean. It was actually sort of fun though because Felicite brought out her laundry to wash and it is fun to be wet and in water when it is so hot out.



After my laundry I took a shower and then watched my host mom cook this really yummy bean dish with meat and tomatoes, green peppers, onions, green beans, potatoes and carrots. It was super good and I ate tons of it because I was really hungry. I also had to take another anti-malarial pill at lunch. After lunch I traced pictures from a Winney the Pooh coloring book so that Felicite and Fidele could color them in. Then I tried to read my French book as they colored. A little after lunch, my Ewe teacher came over again and told me that her mom wanted me to go see their house, so she took me (and Felicite and Fidele) to her house and there began the weirdest part of my day today. First of all, as her mother came out of a room her pagne (wrap-around-cloth) fell off (she was naked underneath). Then they brought me into the room (a bedroom) where a woman in just a bra and a pagne was lying on the bed with her legs un-modestly spread wide open. They had me sit on the bed between this woman and Ese (my Ewe teacher's) mother. The mother told me that we were going to have a party to celebrate the fact that Ese passed and important exam that means that she can continue her studies at the high-school level. She told me that we would eat and drink and dance. I told them that I only drink water and they thought that was pretty funny. The two women were already acting as though they had been drinking though, but I don't think they had. Ese's mother kept telling me that when I return to the U.S. I can't forget my sister Ese, the first person I met in Togo (not exactly true . . . ). She kept repeating that over and over and telling me that Ese will come to my house and meet my parents. I didn't argue, just went along with it. Of course she would be more than welcome to stay with us for a couple of days if she happens to be in Northeastern Pennsylvania, but I am not going to help her get there. She also kept repeating that now that I know where they live, when I have free time I should stop by and chat and laugh with them for awhile. Then Ese got changed out of her church clothes right in front of everyone and stood absolutely topless for what seemed like several very long minutes as the conversation continued. She obviously didn't feel at all uncomfortable standing topless in a room full of people (granted, we were all girls). They gave me long black beaded necklace that they wrapped several times around my wrist as a bracelet and then the woman who had been lying on the bed danced around the room in only her bra and underwear. Strange, very strange. Luckily, I was saved by the rain because Ese wanted to take me back home before it started pouring, which it did shortly. She seemed a bit embarrassed by her mother (and older sister or aunt's ??) behavior.



I was planning to leave the house around three to go to the tech house to charge my computer and read my French book, but it was pouring rain and I ended up tracing more pages from the Winney the Pooh coloring book and trying to read French as Felicite and Fidele colored. I eventually left around 4:30 and, although I didn't get too much reading done, it was nice to get out of the house for a bit and have a little break and see some of the other trainees and talk a little.



In the evening I just played UNO with Felicite and Fidele and another little girl. Dinner was sardines on top of an omelet with onions and tomatoes and koliko (French fried cassava). I hate fish, all fish, and I couldn't make myself take even one bite. I felt badly because I knew my host mom would be upset. Felicite tried to convince me to try it, but I just couldn't do it. My host mom wasn't too happy, but she accepted it better than I expected and didn't seem upset with me. Then I played UNO a bit more and now I am writing to you (it is around 9) and I am going to go to the bathroom, brush my teeth and go to bed. I took a couple Sudafed but they don't seem to be working at all. I hope I am able to sleep.



6/25/07



I have been saved by a power cut from more rounds of UNO. I am going to start this email by writing about a few things that I jotted down to remind myself to write about and I will forget if I just go through the chronology of my day.



A huge spider has taken up residence in my room. I just discovered him tonight. I can't tell you how happy it makes me to have a mosquito net, not just to keep out the mosquitoes, because there really aren't that many in my room or even here in general, but also to keep out all sorts of creepy crawlers. Of course, having a mosquito net doesn't keep me from having dreams that spiders are crawling all over me.



The other day in my French class I learned that here when a woman has twins she will often go consult someone to see what it means because twins are seen as being un-natural. My teacher said that sometimes the woman will be told that the twins want her to go out an beg for a while and so she will do that. Twins also have special names reserved for them as do the third and fourth boy or girl born in a row. For example, if a couple has two girls already and has another right in a row, she will be given a special name as that is also seen as unusual and the same thing goes with boys.



(there is a bug on my computer screen . . . aghghghgh . . . it is a bug that jumps and it keeps jumping on me. By the way, while I am on the topic of bugs, today I ate ants. It was inadvertent. They had invaded my bread and I ate half the bread before realizing that it was full of ants. For about a half hour afterwards I felt as though there were ants crawling up my throat.



Another thing I wanted to tell you was that my host mom had a boutique, a little store at the front of the house. Apparently her sister gave her money to start it up, but she has since run out of money. Felicite says that one of her mom's sisters is in Germany working as a nurse so that is probably the sister who gave her money to start her boutique.



Today I learned that if you give someone a present here, they will come early the next morning to thank you for it. I think this culture is a little like Bolivia's in that people want you to show your appreciation very profusely. I asked my French professor how we could best show our gratitude with our families and he said that if we gave little gifts to the children every once in a while (like food or something) that it would make the parents happy. I will have to think of foods that the children will like but that are good for them. I don't want to give them junk food. Maybe peanuts . . .



I am feeling quite sick today with a cold. All day long my nose has been running horribly - to the point that it dripped down my face the few times I couldn't get to a tissue (toilet paper) fast enough. One of my eyes has also been tearing up all day. Also, my host mom is sick. I don't know exactly what she has - my host dad said it was a fever and she has been in bed most of the day except when she was up cooking for me. That, of course, made me feel horrible. I don't want her to have to cook for me if she is sick, but I don't know what to do. It is also the first time that I have felt really really out of place because she is sick and everything is quieter and less joyful and less busy and Felicite and the others spent a lot of time in the mom's room (where, of course, I don't enter) so I felt a bit isolated and left out of what was going on. I also felt helpless and useless because I can't really DO anything to help or at least I don't know what to do to help. If she continues to be sick tomorrow, I will ask one of my professors what I should do. I could potentially even cook for myself or eat out or whatever . . .



One of the things that I never thought about but that is the one thing that is probably most affecting my stay (particularly right now because I feel that I can't escape it) is the smoke. Everyone uses mostly wood burning stoves to cook on and all day long I feel as though I am breathing smoke. It is especially discomforting with my cold because it seems to just exacerbate all my symptoms. Unfortunately, the neighbor has her kitchen not two meters from my bedroom window and smoke is constantly coming in. I finally just had to shut the window, but then there is no air circulation in my room. I guess that is the lesser of two evils, though, because I can't continue to breathe in the smoke like that. At my French class as well, smoke is always coming in from the neighbor's kitchen. The only place I escape the smoke is the tech house. It is so different from what one would expect from rural Africa - I mean, stereotypically one thinks, non industrialized, rural equals clean fresh mountain air - but that is not exactly the case when wood is used for cooking. Also, there are no chimneys or smoke-removal channels, so the smoke just goes out every escape-hole it finds. Anyway, I find it really unpleasant.



Last night Felicite told me again that she liked the color of my skin. I told her that I liked the color of her skin and she said "why would you like it? it is the color of slaves." I tried to explain that skin color doesn't make a person a slave and that bad people just happened to pick black people for their slaves, but she sort of just ignored me.



I am constantly amazed at how capable ten, twelve, fifteen year old girls are here. Felicite washes dishes and does her laundry. Even Fidele, who is four, does her own laundry. A twelve year old girl (the girl who saved me from the rain the other day) named Valerie, who is a cousin of the family, makes soy products and carries them around and sells them door to door. And a fifteen year old girl, Ese, talks as if she were over twenty, goes to the market and works in the field. All three of these girls are at their age-appropriate levels of education which is really impressive since education here is very difficult and you always have to pass a test to move on to the next level and all three of them seem super smart. The only reason I am not constantly awed by them is that I forget how old (or YOUNG) they are and attribute them with a much greater age and maturity level.



Fidele, like I have said before, is quite the character. I wish I could understand everything she says because I bet it is quite comical. She talks A LOT. Here they have a saying "trop parler c'est une maladie" - talking too much is a sickness. And multiple persons have said that or "elle parle trop" - "she talks too much" about Fidele.



Ok, I think that is the end of the random things.



Luckily I WAS able to sleep relatively well last night and tonight I have already taken a benedryl which will hopefully help. I had French class and Technique (Health) class this morning. The health class was on HIV/AIDS. The most interesting part of the talk (which was given by two guest speakers, a doctor and the president of an association for people living with HIV/AIDS) was about the stigmatization and discrimination against people living with HIV/AIDS. Someone said that to get a visa for the U.S. you have to be HIV negative. You weren't required to have medical testing, but perhaps Africans are more targeted in that sense. That really shocked me. I asked the man giving the talk what he thought were the roots of this prejudice and he said: 1). The way in which the fight against AIDS began, as a campaign against homosexuals and prostitutes; 2). The association of AIDS with sex; 3). Ignorance of how AIDS is transmitted. He said people with HIV/AIDS here are often abandoned/shunned by their families, fired from their jobs, etc. I thought this was really interesting and perhaps I will take it on as a research topic, because it goes along with my interest in discrimination and incorporates health. I think it would be a really good study - to try to get to the bottom of the stigmatization and discrimination. The other really interesting thing I learned is that one of the first questions a Togolese person who has tested positive for HIV asks is "will I be able to have children?" This is apparently a crucial point and when I asked if people adopt children I got a very emphatic "NO" - that adopting children is nothing like having your own children. I think it has something to do with the ability to produce offspring culturally making someone a full man or a full woman. I asked if sterile people are also discriminated against and the Togolese people in the room said "yes." All of them (apart from being very educated people) seemed to fully share in the belief that adopting children cannot in any way, shape or form replace having your own children. All that was very interesting.



I came home, ate lunch, and then played UNO with the kids. Then I went back to school. All afternoon we had presentations on something called PACA - Participatory Analysis for Community Action. It is neat because it is pretty much using anthropological tools to help your community discover and address their needs. I haven't read the whole book (just the part my partner and I were presenting on) but I will read it. I wasn't feeling very well in the afternoon.



We also had another short session on HIV/AIDS where we learned that many people in Togo don't think that AIDS really exists. They translate the acronym SIDA as "Système Inventé pour Decourager les Amoureux" - Invented System to Discourage Lovers. Other people apparently think that AIDS is caused by adultery or cause by gris-gris (what the local version of "black magic" is called). In Ewe, AIDS is called "get skinny and die" or "the big-headed sickness". (By the way, one of the men giving the presentation this morning had HIV/AIDS. He is the first person I have come in contact with in my life, as far as I know, that has HIV/AIDS and he has had it for over 17 years. I was testing myself to see if I felt any differently towards him. I think what I mostly felt was curiosity and not rejection at all).



Afterwards I walked home, ate the dinner which my poor sick host mother made for me and then played UNO until I was saved by a power outage. The power hasn't come back on yet, but it doesn't matter, I am going to bed.



By the way, last night I peed in a bucket in my room because after I finished writing, my host mom had already closed the door leading to the courtyard and I was afraid to try to get out.





6/26/07



Today felt like a very long day. I am still not feeling completely well, although today my cold was more of a cough and runny nose, the good thing being that my eyes weren't so teary. Last night I was able to sleep relatively well.



My host mom is still sick as well, so that has been a source of stress for me. It is stressful to me to want to be able to help, to want to be self sufficient, and not to be able to. This morning she got up and made me hot water for my breakfast, but she forgot to put out the chocolate drink (Nestle, like they have in Uruguay) that I normally drink for breakfast. It wasn't a problem, though, and I just drank tea which, of course, I like as well as you know. But when I came home at lunch, she said "why didn't you tell me that I had forgotten the chocolate this morning?" and she seemed pretty upset about it. She kept repeating "I'm too forgetful." In the morning I talked to the man who is in charge of the trainee-family relationship. He is a very nice man. I told him that I was worried about my host mom, that she seems quite sick and that the only reason that she gets up is to make food for me and that makes me feel badly. He said he would pay a visit to my family to see how sick she is. It is difficult for me to really know because every time I ask her how she is doing she says she is doing well and yet she has spent the last two days in bed. I was a little worried though about having the man talk to my family for fear he would make the situation worse. I think he did fine, though, because this evening when I got home I was allowed to help make my dinner (which consisted of me cutting up some onions and tomatoes for my salad). That is the only way I knew that he had paid a visit to the house, because he and I had talked about getting them to allow me to help out more around the house. And then I felt a bit badly because I know that it is almost MORE work for my host mom if she actually has to let me help. She probably prefers to just do it herself. And then I also felt badly because the Cyrill (the man in charge of the trainee-host family relationship) told her that I like to eat only a light meal for dinner, so she made a salad which is great for me, but then the kids ate salad as well and I was wondering if that was enough for them or good for them . . . So . . . and then because she heard me coughing, she doesn't want me to shower with cold water in the morning and so I have inadvertently created even more work for my sick host mom. On the upside, though, I think she is feeling a bit better. I hope she gets better soon because it is really much more gloomy around here when she isn't well.



I think my Ewe teacher is outside right now, but I don't really want to go out. She stopped by earlier, but I was about to eat dinner and now it is around 8:45 and I just want to write to you and go to bed.



I am sure my host father has more than one wife now because today I met a girl who was introduced to me as my (and Felicite's) sister, same father, different mother. Sometime maybe I will ask how many children he has and maybe I will even get brave enough to ask how many wives he has. =0)



Today was a long day because I wasn't feeling in tip-top shape and also because our day started out with a rather depressing technical session in which the technical trainers sort of said "make a list of ideas for ways to fight against HIV/AIDS" and then after we made the list they went on to tell us how all our ideas wouldn't work very well in Togo in reality. Great. It felt quite negative and depressing.



Then the other group of trainees came to our site for a session on cultural integration. Most of it was useless (for example, they wanted us to place ourselves on one of the levels of Maslows' Hierarchy of Needs. I thought that was stupid because, although I understand Maslow's hierarchy and agree with it in a very general sense, I think things are much more fluid than the pyramid suggests and I think that we are simultaneously and not consecutively trying to satisfy all our needs at once. A better exercise was one in which we placed Togolese and Americans on a chart describing different attitudes and behaviors so as to better understand the culture we are coming from and the one we are in now. Probably the area that will cause the most problem is that we, as Americans, are very future oriented and Togolese are much more present and past oriented. Also Togolese place and emphasis on group activity, Americans on individuality and finally (of the parts I found interesting) Togolese are more interested in being and Americans in doing - action, results etc.



At lunch I came home and ate pate with peanut sauce which was really good. Then I read my French book while Felicite and some of her friends played UNO. It poured buckets. It rains pretty much every day here and the power goes out at least once a day as well.



In the afternoon we had French class - a bad time for it. I was really tired, without energy, patience or concentration. Also it is really hot in the room where we have French class because there isn't much air circulation and I was also wearing a long pagne (wrap around skirt) and I don't understand why women here wear skirts like that because they are hot. Really really hot. Not to mention hard to walk in because you can't take long strides or you get all caught up in your skirt. I guess it is probably the cheapest form of clothing for them because it doesn't really require any tailoring, but still, it is hot (like being wrapped in a plastic bag). Then in late afternoon we went to pay a visit to the chief. It was interesting, very ceremonial. He received us in his house - him sitting on his wooden "throne" and us on benches. Luckily there was a gap between us and the chief in the sense that one of our language teachers translated everything either from Ewe or French into English. I was so hot as I sat there that I could feel the sweat dripping off all parts of my body. We were offered both gin (yovo drink because it comes from Europe) and then the local wine called sodobi. They put certain roots in the sodobi to make it "healthy" I guess. Medicinal roots. Most of the trainees tried the sodobi. I just turned my glass over like my teacher said to do if you didn't want any. One of the technical trainers tried to get me to try some . . . I am starting to like him less and less because he just seems a little sketchy. Anyway, apart from the alcohol, which everyone who tried it said really burns, and the sweat streaming down my body, I learned a lot. I learned that the Ewe people came to Agou Nyogbo around the 1700s, but that at first they lived higher up on the mountain because they were being attacked by the Ashanti people of Ghana. The chief said that even today if you are among the Ashanti and you say you are from Agou Nyogbo, the older Ashanti will rise up in a show of respect because they are amazed to this day that they, the Ashanti, with their guns, were not able to conquer the Ewe people of Agou Nyogbo. The chief said that their magic protected them. That they sent virgins carrying water on their head out front and that all the bullets penetrated the jars of water, making the water boil, but keeping the virgins and the warriors safe so that the warriors could get close enough to attack. All this warfare is why the chief was traditionally male. Today the chief could technically be a woman, but I don't think that that has happened in Agou Nyogbo yet. Then we learned that the chief is selected by a committee of elders from one of three royal families. This all takes place after the old chief dies, but they never say that a chief has died, but rather that he has "traveled." So the committee of elders selects a new chief, but keeps their decision secret until the day in which all members of a town are called back (even people who live abroad) for the announcement of the new chief. On this day, one of the elders circles the crowd three times while holding a white powder which he then throws on the person who has been chosen as chief. That person is then whisked away to a more private washing ceremony and returned to the crowd wearing a white pagne. A day is then chosen for the coronation and the name of the potential chief is given to the gendarmes so that they can investigate the person and give him the governmental ok, making the chief both a traditional and modern chief in the sense that he works both for the people and the government. So it was all very interesting. Eventually we took our leave, and when you shake hands with the chief you are supposed to hold your right elbow with your left hand as you shake with your right and bend in the knees.



Other than that, not much happened today. As I said, I sat with my host mom as she made dinner. She has taken to using the gas stove a lot which I am glad about, but also a little wary knowing that it goes with me when I leave and that she will no longer have it then. Perhaps she will get her husband to buy her one.



6/27/07 and 6/28/07



I am writing this the morning of the 28th because last night I was too tired to write. I took some of the kids in my house to the tech house to watch a movie and we didn't get home until around ten o'clock which is already past my bedtime. I haven't been feeling very well and last night was my worst night yet. I took some anti allergy medicine and some cough syrup and slept well until one in the morning when I woke up having to pee really badly. I peed in my shower bucket and then lay down again. I was coughing a lot and finally convinced myself to get up and take some more cough syrup. I lay down again and less than five minutes later vomited all the cough syrup (among other things) out in my shower bucket as well. I was feeling really nauseous, but after vomiting I felt a little better. I couldn't take more cough syrup, though, because I thought it would probably make me vomit again, so I just had to suffer through the coughing for most of the rest of the night. Right before I woke up I realized that I had stopped coughing and had had a few hours of rest which was good. Today I am feeling a bit better. I am still coughing and blowing my nose (yesterday I went through a roll and a half of toilet paper - I don't think I have ever produced so much snot in my life =0).



I will have to continue this email a bit later because we are going to start our session. I came early to write, but got roped into participating in a little skit instead. I am going to have to try to convince a "sick" woman to go to the hospital and get an AIDS test.



Yesterday I had a bad morning. First thing I learned from Cyrill (my site coordinator) that my host mom told him that she has malaria, but that she is getting better and that she doesn't mind cooking for me because even though she needs to rest a lot, she doesn't want to be completely inactive. I don't know if it really is malaria, like I mentioned before, I think, people here have a tendency to call everything malaria. I also wasn't feeling well and I felt as though I was on the verge of tears the whole morning. I hate that feeling because it makes me feel very vulnerable because I am afraid that any little thing will send me over the edge. We had French class and then we went to the other village for a safety and security talk. Somehow I don't remember everything they talked about - I guess a few of the interesting things are that they have gendarmes here and also police. The police are based mostly in the larger towns and cities and the gendarmes have jurisdiction over both urban and rural areas. The gendarmes also have military training, but they aren't military exactly. We learned to identify the different types of security forces based on the uniforms - the gendarmes wear khaki uniforms, the police wear blue uniforms and then they can both wear a greenish uniform, but you can still tell them apart because the police (I think) wear this square pin on their chest and the gendarmes wear it on their shoulder. I also learned that only Lomé has firefighters, but that the it isn't a huge deal because in the smaller cities and towns the solidarity is such that if you scream fire, everyone will come to help you put the fire out. I also learned that different places have different cries that are recognized there as cries for help. No one makes those cries unless they need help and then everyone comes to your aid, so it is really important to know the special cries for help in your area - they could be words or just cries. So it was interesting, but I wasn't feeling well at all and I was in a bit of a bad mood. I was just coughing and blowing my nose constantly.



We had the afternoon off yesterday and that was a really good break for me because I spent the whole afternoon in Afrikiko, a bar where one of the trainees lives and which has become our hang-out spot. It was really good for me because a lot of the other girls get together every evening to talk and share stories and I never go out after dark, so sometimes I feel as though I'm missing out on the girl-time. So I stayed there from 2:30 until 6:30 and it made me feel a lot better just to have some down time - the girls shared failed love stories and it was very interesting to learn more about people and to get a bit more insight on the other trainees previous lives and personalities. Even though I didn't share anything, hearing their stories made me feel a bit closer to them. At the same time, though, I don't feel like I have had very similar experiences or that I am having a very similar experience right now. Many of them feel as though their minds are still in the States. They are missing the food, missing their lives, and concentrating on all they have given up to be here. Someone asked the volunteer who is staying with us how long her heart and mind was still in the States and she said about six months. Even though I have been a bit sick this week, I am still so very happy to be here and all I can think about is how lucky I am to be here.



Afterwards I went home for dinner and at first glance at my dinner, I thought, oh no, my host mom put my mangos in a sauce, but she had made a fruit salad with mango, pineapple and banana and I couldn't think of anything I would have preferred to eat. It had some yogurt-like sauce, which I didn't really like, but it was the first time I finished all the food she had prepared for me. I hope she takes the hint and makes me more fruit salads like that - it was the perfect dinner.



After dinner we came down to the tech house to watch a movie. It was the first time I had been out of my house after dark. We had some technical difficulties because the projector that the girls had been using to watch movies was taken away (we don't know where it went, back to Lomé perhaps) and so we ended up watching the movie on my computer - the sound isn't great, but the kids (about twenty people from the village came) seemed to really enjoy it a lot. We watched a movie called Sandlot, which I have never seen before, and we put it in French so that the kids could understand better. I actually didn't watch the movie. Most of the trainees went outside to talk while the kids watched the movie because we couldn't hear or understand it anyway and I was also coughing a lot. We just chatted a bit more. I wasn't feeling well at all and just wanted to go home, but of course I had to wait for the kids who came with me. I say kids, but they were two ten year olds, a twelve year old and a fourteen year old. At the end of the movie, it was fun to see their reactions. They were so into the film - completely concentrated on what was happening on the little screen and they would talk about it in Ewe and scream and yell and laugh in response to the images on the screen. It was fun. Many of them have televisions in their houses, but I don't know how often they get to see kids movies in French and with a good image (even if the sound wasn't great because we didn't have speakers). Anyway, it was rewarding to know that they had a good time.



This morning I am feeling a bit better and hoping that I am over the worst of my sickness. Today we are going to learn about our post descriptions and that is scary and exciting all at the same time. I am trying to wait for the descriptions before I start thinking about what I really want. I don't want to fixate myself on a particular post, though, because I don't know what chance I have of getting the one I want most. I also have to mediate between location and job description. I think I am hoping to be somewhere more in the South and maybe also in a region where they speak Ewe or Mina (which is close to Ewe) but I also want a small village and I want a new (not replacement) post. From what I understand, posts are open for four years - so they go through two volunteers. I think the posts are about half and half replacement posts and new posts. Anyway, I will know more a couple of hours from now and then I will tell you all about it.



I am getting a skirt made this week. I am also happy because I am able to save about $10 a week, so I am going to try to keep saving that much. I am not spending money on anything but transportation to Kpalime, internet, getting clothes made, and little snacks. Also, from what I understand, after we swear in we get $10 a day which is a lot so maybe I will be able to save some.



The other thing I was thinking this morning is that I am really glad that I am not expecting anyone to send me letters or packages because all the girls get a little down and upset when people come from Lome and don't bring any mail. It doesn't affect me because I am not expecting mail. Also, stamps here cost 600 cFA for one letter and if you compare, an hour of internet costs 400 cFA, so I think internet is a better deal.



So we got our post descriptions today and that is the big exciting news. I have already picked out my top four choices. I definitely have a top top choice, but I am not sure that I will get it because I think a lot of people are interested in it. I will describe my top four choices to you and then if I have time I will give you the other posts. (The information is from the notes I took and that is why it is a bit choppy).



Top Choice: Agou-Avedjé; Plateaux Region

A small village of about 2,000-3,000 inhabitants in the prefecture of Agou (same prefecture where I am right now). Only about 20 kilometers from Kpalime, no electricity, no running water (wells and pumps), cell phone coverage with MOOV (like Viva I think). Working with an NGO called CADO which was created by young people and works with orphans. Also a Dispensaire (clinic) with a nurse and a birth attendant. The volunteer would also work with the schools and a potable water project that Engineers Without Borders is working on (Dad, do you want to get involved? =0). Other great things about this post are that I think the NGO has electricity, so I could probably charge my laptop, it is easily accessible from Ghana, easy to get to Lome, they speak Ewe, and it is literally right on the other side of the mountain from where I am living right now and as I have said many many times, it is absolutely, incredibly beautiful here.



Second Choice: Nyassive; Maritime Region

A small village of about 2,000-3,000 people; a newly built dispensary run by community health workers - struggling to get a nurse. Very well organized, motivated village, young chief, development oriented. One homologue speaks English - lived in Ghana. 35 kilometers from Tchieve (nearest internet) on a bad road (but you have motorcycle privileges). Cell phone coverage at some points. No electricity or running water and no landline. Job consists of working to jumpstart the dispensaire (clinic). I have heard lots of good things about this village and they also speak Ewe there. I am not sure how easy it would be to get to Ghana though - I would probably have to go down to Lome and then over or up to Kpalime and over.



Third Choice: Avassikpé; Plateaux Region

A very small village of about 2,000 inhabitants. One dispensaire (clinic) which covers a big area encompassing 24 villages and farms. 20 kilometers from Notse (the nearest internet point). Easy to get to Lome. No running water, no electricity, good cell phone coverage. Small dispensaire, a young female birth attendant, no nurse. Working with dispensaire, in secondary schools and possibly with NGOs in Notse - people living with HIV/AIDS. Lots of biking. They also speak mostly Ewe here I think and it would be more or less accessible from Ghana.



Fourth Choice: Tchoide; Centrale Region

A small village of 2,000-3,000 people. Twenty kilometers from Sotoubua (closest internet point). A well-built dispensaire with four full-time employees - working with baby weighing, family planning, malaria, HIV/AIDS. Working with schools. No electricity, no cell phone coverage, no running water, no land phone. (This one is a first choice that is far behind my first three because I don't think they speak Ewe here and I am not sure how accessible Ghana is from here.)



The problem with all of my top three choices is that they are all replacement posts and considering the fact that Peace Corps rotates out of towns every four years, I am not sure what would happen if I wanted to extend for a third year - I might get moved somewhere else . . . Anyway, these are just preliminary considerations. I will list the other posts for you incase you want to look them up on the internet. In choosing my favorites mostly I have been considering the smallest villages that will allow me weekly access to internet, that are relatively close to Ghana and where they speak Ewe. The smallest villages are all 2,000-3,000 people. None of the villages they described are smaller than that. The totality of the posts are: Maritime Region: Vogon, Gboto-Vodoupe, Nyassive; Plateaux Region: Agou-Avedje, Tado, Avassikpe, Notse; Centrale Region: Tchare-baou, Tchifama, Tchoide; Kara Region: Ketao, Lama-Kpedah; Savanes Region: Sagbiebou, Dapaong. I got organized and made a little chart so that everyone put X's on the lines corresponding to the posts they are NOT interested in and O's on the posts that they are open to going to. Eventually I will have everyone rank their top choices, just to see how much overlap we have with people wanting to go to the same places. A couple people have already indicated their top choices and none of them are Agou-Avedje, but almost everyone put it as a place they were open to going to, so we will have to see how it all pans out. We will know our post assignments next Friday.



So anyway, that is my news for today. We spent the whole afternoon listening to the region and post descriptions and then we had mini interviews with Tchao, the APCD for CHAP (health volunteers) just to tell him our first impressions of the posts and start giving him an idea of where we might like to be placed. It is still questionable, though, how much emphasis he will place on our requests. I mentioned my first three choices and told him that I prefer small towns and do not want to be placed in the northern two regions. After class we were going to go to the bar to talk about the posts. Usually I don't buy anything when we go, but a cousin of my host family - Valerie - the girl (I thought she said she was twelve but today she told another trainee that she is fifteen) who saved me from the rain and was going to braid my hair and teach me how to make tofu, met me outside my class and ended up accompanying us to the bar and so I had to buy her a drink of course (here, if you invite someone to a place like a bar or a restaurant it means that you are offering to pay for anything they consume). So there went 400 cFA which is a bummer because I don't like to waste my money on silly things like that, but oh well, I am over it and I am just fomenting good will anyway. I mean if she is willing to teach me how to make tofu and braid my hair, it is definitely worth the 400cFA.



6/29/07



I jotted down some other things that I wanted to tell you before I recount my day. Sometimes men say "Bonjour" to me in this high-pitched, squeaky voice like I read about it other volunteers blogs. According to them, people speak to us that way because that is how they think French women sound. I really like the watch my mom gave me for Christmas, but it stinks. I have to wash it every couple of days or it becomes unbearable and I don't know what to do about it. I think it soaks up my sweat and gets stinky. The electric wiring here is not hidden in the walls, but rather attached to the outside of the wall - I guess because the buildings were here before the electricity was.



Ok - about my day. =0) It took me a very long time to get to sleep last night because I was coughing a lot, but eventually I slept. Today I am feeling much better. I am still coughing and blowing my nose a lot, but my eyes aren't running and my cough isn't as tight. Hopefully tonight I will be able to sleep a bit better.



I had French class early in the morning and then an Ewe class and then we went to visit the secondary school and we learned all about how the school system works - it was quite interesting. I think the school system is based on the French system - they have six levels of primary school (l'ecole primaire) and then they have to take and pass a standardized exam so as to go on to the next level, which is like middle school (college) and encompasses four levels. Then they have to take and pass another standardized exam to move on to the next level, lycee, which is like high school and encompasses three "grades" (so I guess they end up with thirteen years of schooling if they make it all the way through). In each of the last two years of high school there are more standardized exams that have to be passed before you can go to university. From what I understand, once you pass your BAC (the exam at the end of high school), university here is free (However, it is very difficult to pass these exams). There are only two universities in Togo as well as many technical schools. The public schools, though, from first grade through the end of high school are not free. Boys have to pay around 4500 cFA a year (around $9) and girls aound 3500cFA a year (around $7). Girls pay less so as to encourage more parents to send their girls to school. The school we visited is in a relatively wealthy town and so has a higher proportion of girls than most public schools, but even so the girls only make up 1/3 of the student population and there are hardly any girls at the high school level. Class size here ranges from about 50 to 75 students per classroom (WOW!). Most of the teachers at the middle school and high school levels are men, but there are more women teachers (apparently) at the primary school level. The other interesting thing I learned is that by national decree, girls who attend school in Togo have to have their hair cut really short because apparently the girls were spending too much time and money on their hair and not on other things. Uniforms are also required and consist of kakhi pants (for boys) and skirts (for girls) and white tops. A final interesting thing is that during the three month vacation (which takes place between June and August, so, right now) the students come to the school to do manual labor - work around the school. Today many of them were assembled there for these activities and also to meet us and it was a little intimidating because I would say 95% of them were carrying coupe-coupes (otherwise known as machetes). According to my language teacher, machetes here are considered a working tool and not a weapon, but I can't help the association between machete's and death in my own mind (Dominican Republic, Rwanda) and little alarm bells go off when I see people carrying machetes. So anyway, that was the most interesting part of my day where I learned the most.



For lunch I had some sort of slightly fermented corn cakes with a sauce. It was fine, not my favorite dish, but fine. My host mom still thinks I don't eat enough though and even Felicite, my ten year old host sister scolds me for not eating enough.



After lunch we had French class (again) and had a strange conversation about weapons and violence and the death penalty and religion. It seems as though my language professor (we got a new language professor today) is Catholic and he was tending to lead the conversation towards Christianity and the Bible. For example, when we were doing the subjunctive, he used phrases from the Bible to illustrate specific usages.



After French we had time for "private studies" which translates into everyone going to Afrikiko (the bar and PCT hangout). We have several volunteers here because they are going to be giving presentations at one of our sessions tomorrow, so it was a good chance to get to know some new volunteers and ask them questions. I didn't learn anything particularly interesting except that people are very strange. One volunteer actually said that he finds it amusing to wave money in front of a child who has just asked him for money and then yank it away as the child reaches out for it. Does that not seem just a little twisted? Maybe he should consider going home if that is what this experience has become for him.



This evening, after dinner, I had fun playing UNO with my Ewe teacher, her cousin and Felicite. I like my Ewe teacher a lot - even though before I wasn't so sure that I liked her. I think she is amusing and it is fun to be around her. Maybe I like her more now that she isn't coming to teach me Ewe every night =0).